Even Therapists Need a Place to Land
Many people do not go to therapy because something is wrong. Instead, they go because something truly matters to them so deeply that they prioritize change in their life. All of us, even the most put together, need a place where it is simply okay to fall apart, to be a mess, to be deeply and unashamedly human.
I once attended a marketing event and a woman was there. She was a therapist, which was not surprising in and of itself given the event was tailed for mental health resources in the area. But, in this setting, she was a therapist that specialized and worked with other therapists. I had never once, until that moment, considered that therapists may also need a place to be human. Buzzwords tend to circle the mental health airspace all the time: vicarious trauma, second-hand trauma, burnout, self-care, and more immediately come to mind and are met with my internal resistance due to the lack of intentionality that surrounding the adequate, healthy, and appropriate dealing with of these topics. Yet, this woman decided to take these words and do something actionable with them. She ladled out these concepts from the ethereal soup of mental health speak, solidified them, and carved out a space where she can not only exist within her profession, but where others can exist within the very same profession and be validated in their experiences.
You see, even therapists need therapists. But, why say this? Isn’t this a given, a completely obvious statement? Moreover, when we hear of therapists going to their own therapy, what does that do and offer for their clients? What permissions are granted by this simply, yet powerful, act?
I am a therapist, and I also have my own therapist. In an ideal world it would be therapists all the way down. Take that, turtles! And, as a therapist-having-therapist, it gives me permission to exist as I am in my own therapy sessions with my therapist. I can be messy. I can be angry. I can grieve, smile, cry, laugh, and experience the full range of human emotions. Because, and here’s my secret, I am messily-human to my very core. I am deeply flawed, carry scars, and have my own hurts and hangups. I have a complicated family system on both sides, I have messy friends, my dating history is full of missteps and broken trust, and my relationship with myself has seen some rough moments. But, entering a safe and warm space grants me the ability to sit with these elements of myself and to show them to another in a way that they are fully and beautifully held, where my humanity is honored, and my struggles are seen. Where I can gather the courage to search for myself.
So, again, I ask: Who goes to therapy? Therapy is for you and for me. For those that are willing to be present with themselves, to entrust themselves to another person who has been tasked with and accepts the responsibility of holding each client, each traveler, in their process and to honor whatever it is that is being brought into this space regardless of how big or small. It is for those that wish and dare to explore the depths of themself for the sake of living a more fulfilled, settled, and personal life. It is for those that are hurting and scared, those that are thriving and living beautiful lives, and for everyone in between. Therapy is not about fixing yourself; it’s about learning how to walk alongside yourself with honesty. In the words of Mary Oliver, a poet who my prior therapist exposed me to, “You only to have let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.”
When I recognize my own mess, I am better able to lower the threshold of expectations for my clients. I am messy, and it is okay that you are, too. Therapists are not gods, magic workers, or genies in a bottle. When I allow myself to be fully human in my own therapy, I become a better therapist who can sit with yours without judgement, urgency, or expectation.
My name is Lynn. I am a therapist. I am doing better each day, and I am proud to have my own wonderful therapist who encourages me toward growth. My name is Lynn, and I invite you in.
Written 12/31/2025